Normi(e)lization

Anyone that knows me personally knows I’m big-hearted. I support in the way kids find ways to get their hands sticky. For the people I love, it’s never come with any expectations. And that’s wrong.

There are about a dozen people I make sure to wish a happy birthday, or a belated if I’m operating at less than optimal performance, as a matter of fond routine. To me, they’re far too important not to. The gesture is minimal, but every year it’s a chance to reaffirm ‘I love you’. And I don’t miss that chance.

Last year, very few of that annual posse wished me a happy birthday. That mattered. As a big-hearted fellow, my instinct tells me, “wish them this year anyway, it’s their day.” And that’s just not fair, is it?

As my frontal lobe fully comes into maturity, a realization occurs in my adult brain: I’m wasting energy doing for others what they’re too apathetic to do for me.

It’s not about love lost. It’s simply love not wasted. Stay with me.

The point of the world wide web is to celebrate each other. I still believe that. I genuinely feel good about throwing a like or comment a friend’s way when they’ve made the effort to keep me updated about their life. It’s effortless leaving that heart. Which brings us to normielization. I am the outlier on social media. The dude who throws likes like they’re O2 particles. Your friendly-neighborhood reply guy. And yet time has slowly played its hand, revealing to me that perhaps I do want to be afforded the same treatment, at least from the people who’ve come to expect it from me.

So with heavy heart, I must announce my resignation from my post as a D1 cheerleader. Humor during a serious moment seriously does damage to a good point. The point is, I don’t take happy birthdays or likes on a server too seriously, but maybe I should. Perhaps there’s a simple joy to observing I haven’t yet gleaned.

Like I said, no love lost. Simply love not wasted.

So until I see a reason to, Find Your Love somewhere else, or start showing up.